Hold My Hand As You Stay Awhile

If you read my last post, you will remember that I started to look at the Holy Spirit and tried to get a better picture of Him. My focus in that post was the Witness of the Holy Spirit, yet it wasn't a complete picture. Though I spent three weeks studying and writing, I could not give a full picture of the Spirit. Now, even if I spent a Lifetime writing, I'm sure that I couldn't give a truly complete picture of any part of God, let alone the Spirit. Even If I studied every verse in Scripture, I'm sure something would elude me. Yet, I will try to give a slightly better picture of this part of the Trinity.

Ephesians is a very good book of the Bible. Not that any one book of the Bible is better than another, but Ephesians, I have found, is a good book to look at the Christian Character. It is brief in respects to other Book, but it has very specific commands for the Christian, whither New or Old. It is in this book that we find the first bit of Scripture I would like to look at. Ephesians 4:3-13 states:

3 endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called in one hope of your calling; 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6 one God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all. 7 But to each one of us grace was given according to the measure of Christ's gift. 8 Therefore He says: "When He ascended on high, He led captivity captive, And gave gifts to men." 9 (Now this, "He ascended"--what does it mean but that He also first descended into the lower parts of the earth? 10 He who descended is also the One who ascended far above all the heavens, that He might fill all things.) 11 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, 13 till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ;

What does that all mean? It can be confusing, but it need not be. The first several verses (Ephesians 4:3-6) establishes the Unity which is within the Spirit. The Spirit is our Peace, and the one Hope we have. Truly, we are United within One Body in One Baptism for One Lord. Note the repetition of One. Clearly, Paul is not trying to say that all Believers are the same person. Rather, he is showing us that, because of the Spirit, we are United as One. Verse 6 goes on to say we Serve the Father who is above all. Brothers and Sisters, this is a Glorious thing! Our God is above all, above everything that we could ever face! What an Awesome God we serve!

Now, what does the rest of the verses say? It's all well and good to know the Peace and Unity of of the Spirit and the Power of the Lord, but there is even more. Well, the verses further establish the Power of Christ's Salvation, but there is another important part that I do not what you to miss (I do not want you to miss Christ's Salvation either, yet that is not the focus of this post).

One thing that people might notice in this passage of Scripture is that Paul mentions gifts. What are these gifts? What is Paul talking about? Let us look at verses 11 and 12 for a moment.

11 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ,

Paul is saying that God gave us each our own gifts for our own ministry on earth. Some may have been looking and looking for their ministry, yet they didn't realize that is was as simple as looking into themselves. I am not saying your ministry is yourself; I am saying your ministry is you. Let me explain. Your ministry is your life, your existence, your very being. People cry out for a ministry and wonder and wonder what it is. I can tell you from experience, we have the wrong idea, how we live and what we do with what God has given us is our ministry. God has hardwired us all differently for different jobs, as evidenced in this passage, but we are called to a Life of Ministry, to edify the Body of Christ.

I realize that what I just said is not very clear. Some could say that I am not correctly portraying Scripture. I would like to point to Romans 12:3-8, which exemplifies what I am saying.

3 For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. 4 For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function, 5 so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another. 6 Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, let us prophesy in proportion to our faith; 7 or ministry, let us use it in our ministering; he who teaches, in teaching; 8 he who exhorts, in exhortation; he who gives, with liberality; he who leads, with diligence; he who shows mercy, with cheerfulness.

This passage points out that each has their own measure of faith. It warns that we should not think more highly of ourself than we ought, but to think soberly, or with a clear mind. That is, while I might be a teacher, and you might be a layman, that does not mean I am more than your in Christ, nor does it mean you are more than me. What God has given to us for our ministry is meant for our ministry, and whatever gifts He may haven given, so use in the measure of faith. That is not to say that just because you don't feel like Serving the Lord that you can just push it aside for that day. This means, as much as was given is how much should be returned. For, truly, any talent you may have is not from you, but from the Lord, and what is His should be used for Him.

I am not saying it is not hard. It will be. It calls for something more than yourself, but as J.F. Baldwin said, "It may be a truism to say that no one is perfect, but the redeemed Christian, by the power of the Holy Spirit, is called to perfection" (1).

We have started talking about something that is very important. As I have mentioned, we all have gifts from the Holy Spirit. I have said that you shouldn't think too highly of yourself, and that we are called to perfection. All of this has been centered around the Holy Spirit and the gifts of the Spirit. However, we haven't gotten into the meat of the issue. What are the gifts? Well, then we must look into the Scriptures to really understand. For this, I would like to point your attention to 1 Corinthians 12-14. (Ch. 12, 13, 14) I have linked these passages in the interest of space, but I encourage you to read them before continuing.

Now, not everyone has the same Spiritual Gifts. While I might have Discernment, another person might Speak in Tongues. As Paul says in Chapter 12, verses 4 through 6:

4 There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit. 5 There are differences of ministries, but the same Lord. 6 And there are diversities of activities, but it is the same God who works all in all.

We are all called to our own works in the Spirit. Just like we are all different parts of the Body of Christ, we all have different functions. Yet, this doesn't matter because Paul goes on to say the manifestation of the Spirit is given to each for the profit of all (1 Corinthians 12:7). I would say, the mouth eats to nourish the body while the feet walk to move the body, yet both are important and benefit the whole.

What's even more wonderful is that these gifts are from God! As the Spirit is God and it is by the Spirit we receive our gifts (1 Corinthians 12:11). I rejoice in this fact. I know that what I do in the Lord will be worked out, for Jesus said all things are possible for God (Matthew 19:26, Mark 10:27, Mark 14:36, Luke 18:27) and that all things are possible for those who believe (Mark 9:23). With promises like that, I know I can do whatever the Lord has for me.

The rest of 1 Corinthians, Chapter 12 warns that no one should want to do what others do in the Spirit because they do not. Paul makes a very valid point. We are a Body of Believers, and, without parts, there would be no body. Likewise, body parts do not all do the same things, and the same is true with believers.

1 Corinthians 13 has to be one of my favorite chapters in the Bible. The whole point is that Love is the most important part of any Christian. Paul tells us that we would do anything and lack love, making whatever we've done without profit (1 Corinthians 13:3). Christ Himself said the first two Commandments, both which center on Love, are the Greatest of the Commandments and on which the Law and the Prophets hang (Matthew 22:35-40, Mark 12:29-33).

The characteristics of Love (1 Corinthians 13:4-8) are characteristics all Christians should have. Love is long suffering (patient), kind, does not envy, is not proud (parading) or boastful (puffed up). Love is not rude, does not seek it's own, is not provoked, and does not think evil. Love turns the other cheek and does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in truth. Love endures and is hopeful. If any Believer needs a list of how he/she needs to be, this is it.

Chapter 14 of 1 Corinthians is an interesting chapter to read. I have actually had debate with people on the content of this chapter. I hope to clear up some misconceptions that people may have about what is actually being discussed here. I think it would be good to take this chapter at its words and not look for too much more than what is plainly said.

I love the first part of verse 1. Paul says here to "pursue love." What is being said? Chase after love, seek it out. To pursue is to be active. Actively chase after love. When I read that verse, I am filled with awe for the Author and Finisher of Our Faith. We know that God is Love, and we are told to pursue love. We are being told to pursue God!

Then Paul tells us to "desire spiritual gifts." Desire, for the most part is a passive term, which fits very well with what Paul already told us. The Holy Spirit gives gifts, and we need not look for what we do not have. What we are being told is to want spiritual gifts, not to look for the spiritual gifts of others.

Now we get to the the debatable part of the chapter. Isn't it sad that we haven't even finished verse one and debate already begins? I believe it is, but there are those who will speak out when they do not understand, and those who will speak when they understand falsely.

I want to make this clear, Paul is not saying prophesy more important than speaking in tongues. He is also not saying that we should not speak in tongues. If anyone tells you that he is making either claim, do not listen to them. What Paul says is that tongues are signs for unbelievers and prophesy is for believers. Yes, I am aware Paul says "he who prophesies is greater than he who speaks with tongues" (verse 5). However, he says in the same breath, "unless indeed he interprets." Paul said this because prophesy edifies, or builds up, the church (verse 4). Yet we find that with someone to interpret, speaking in tongues does the same thing (verse 5). You cannot take one verse and make it stand alone, because the Bible is the Whole Word of God, not the divided word.

The problem with tongues is when they come without meaning. I was once a part of a church that put a lot of stock into speaking in tongues. Unfortunately, many felt that you had to speak in tongues or you were not bathed in the Holy Spirit. I had many discussions about this with several members of the church about this and pointed this very chapter to them. This was all to no effect. Prophesy is great about it comes from the Spirit and can reveal much. Tongues, lest there is an interpretation, can confuse and cloud. Yet never does Paul say either is bad.

20 Brethren, do not be children in understanding; however, in malice be babes, but in understanding be mature.

Have you ever seen a baby be cruel? Have you seen a baby hate? Curse? I know I haven't, and I have worked in a child care center. In hatefulness, cruelty, and cursing, be like a baby. Don't do it. However, make every effort for understanding so that you may be mature. This is why I write and study, to be mature in my understanding and so that others may be mature in their's.

Paul goes on to speak on orderly worship. I have never seen a church do this. Yet, does that mean we shouldn't go to church? Of course not. However we do need to take all of this into account, especially if we use our gifts in church.

From here on, I will not speak on this chapter. I am not ready at this time to tackle the most debated issue in this part of Scripture. I do not think I am mature enough yet to speak on it. I know the words well, and I cannot tell you any more than what Paul said about women in church. I have no deep insight and do not know what to say but to say I do not know.

I hope this provided a better look at the gifts of the Spirit. I encourage you, reader, to study this for yourself and look for the love of God. Pursue love with all you have. It is a many and wondrous thing to serve God the Father, to be redeemed in Christ Jesus, and to be comforted by the Spirit.

1. Baldwin, Jeff F. The Twelve Trademarks of Great Literature. Oregon City, OR: Fishermen Press, 2002

Whisper Softly Please

I've been Saved for a few good years now. I do not know where I am in my walk with the Lord. All I really know is that I am closer to Him than I was when I began my walk with Him. I know that my understanding of Truth is much greater than it was Four Years ago, last December. It's funny how that seems like such a long time. I guess it's because so much has happened since then, but that is really the point of this post.

The point of this post is to look into the nature of the third part of God. The Lord Himself has a lot of air time in our thoughts, as does Jesus Christ. However, why is it that we don't talk about the Holy Spirit as much? This has always baffled me. I remember when I was a small child, going to one of the many churches my mother dragged me to. Not that she ever really understood the importance of church (but I do hope and pray that one day she'll come to know Jesus). I remember some talk of the Holy Spirit, but I remember this talk was mainly in the prayers people gave. What is this Holy Spirit? In my quest for knowledge, I had to know more. When it comes to Truth, the best place to turn is the Bible. So, let's go there and look into the nature of the Holy Spirit. Let's see more about this part of God that's just simply not sought after.

I guess we should start off by asking the fundamental question, "What is the Holy Spirit?" Jesus called the Holy Spirit a Helper and the Spirit of Truth (John 14:16-17). Jesus also claimed the Holy Spirit was a Teacher and a Giver of Words (Luke 12:11-12). Paul describes the Spirit as a Unifier, a Source of Spiritual Profit for All (1 Corinthians 12:4-7), and as a Guarantee of God's Love and Protection (2 Corinthians 5:1-6). John tells us that the Spirit is the Manifestation of Christ in Us (1 John 3:24 & 1 John 4:13) and a Light for Every Man (John 1:7-9). Luke, Christ, Paul, Peter, and John all agree that the Spirit is a Witness for Christ's Sacrifice and New Covenant With Us (John 15:7, Acts 50:32, Roman 8:16, Hebrews 10:15, & 1 John 56-7).

The Bible paints a pretty clear picture of Something that seemed so vague before. Yet, we see so little of this Helper, this Spirit of Truth? Why is it that we don't look at the Manifestation of Christ within us? I think this Subject deserves more of a look.

Now, to do a truly detailed study of what the Holy Spirit actually is would take a book and not a blog post. Yet I am not a book writer as of yet, so blogging is what I know. While I believe that the Holy Spirit is shaping me to becoming a writer some day (Lord Willing), now I am learning the craft the Lord has revealed to me and I am walking in Faith with Him. It's because of this that I am writing this in hopes of better understanding His Third Part.

Now, I am going to step away from the Bible for just a moment to address an issue that comes up for many Christians. That is explaining how it is we claim to serve One True God, yet talk about the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Well, from my understanding, the Trinity can be expressed in a simple manner. In modern Psychology has started to do research on prayer and it's effects on sick people in hospitals. This branch of Psychology excepts the existence of the soul into modern understanding of Psychology. So, by this understanding of Psychology, we see that the Human creature can be looked at as a Mind, a Body, and a Soul. For God, the Father is the Mind, Jesus is the Body, the Holy Spirit is the Soul. I hope this helps with some people explain some of why God is One True God.

Now, I will go back into Scripture. While writing and studying, I consult sources outside myself to help better my understanding of Truths. To this effect, I spoke to others about this blog post as I began to write it. One question kept coming up, "Does the Holy Spirit have a gender?" That is, is the Holy Spirit a He or an It? Well, John 14:16-17 can answer that question for us quite simply.

16 And I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever-- 17 the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.

If you remember, I referenced John 14:16-17 in my original list as to what the Holy Spirit is. In these verses, Christ said He was sending the Holy Spirit as a Helper and He (the Holy Spirit) will Dwell with us and in us. (That is something very important to note for many reasons, but I will not address them all as of right now.)

Now that the question of Person/Gender is out of the way, I would like to look at another aspect of the Holy Spirit and His Existence here.

If you remember, I called the Holy Spirit a Witness. The question we must look at is, what does that mean? He is a Witness? What does that mean? Those who are not prepared to see a Deep Spiritual Truth should stop reading now, for we are about to step into the Realm of Biblical Truth.

John 15 is an excellent Chapter to prove what Christ meant by a Witness. I will only link the Chapter for interest of space, but it should be read before continuing.

The True Vine (Jesus; John 15:1) makes an very important point throughout this Chapter. Jesus speaks of bearing Fruits, which those who do not will be taken away, but those that bear fruit will be pruned (John 15:1). Now pruning would be the trails that we as Christians go through to shape our faith, ministry, and self. However, there is something else here. Those who do not bear fruit will be taken away. Does this mean that you can lose your Salvation in Christ? John 4:14 is very clear about that.

14 "but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life."

So, here's Christ saying that His Salvation is Eternal and Everlasting. That seems very clear to me. So, why would Christ say anything about those who don't bear fruit? He said before this that Salvation is Eternal, so what is Christ saying here? If you have made it this far and suddenly find yourself not ready for a Deep Spiritual Truth, now is the time to stop reading and come back when you are ready. If you are ready, please continue with me.

John 15:26 says: "But when the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me." Well, we know that the other branches cannot be other Christians, so we need to look at some other possibility. A question that is posed is how is it that some are Saved while others are not? Scripture makes it very clear that no one come to the Father except through Christ (John 14:6). How is this possible? Christ has gone back into Heaven until His Second Coming, so how can we come to Christ and enter into the Lord's Salvation? Well, we need a Witness that is somehow also God. We need Him so that we might be Saved. So, there is only one possibility, the Holy Spirit. When Christ said, "And you also will bear witness, because you have been with Me from the beginning (John 15:27)," He did not mean that you and I were with Him in the beginning, not literally. Not would mean we began as Heavenly Creatures and does not follow what the rest of the Bible says about Sinful Man. So, what can it mean? I tell you that it means the Holy Spirit comes to us and gives us the Truth of Christ, and if we accept that Truth, we bear witness to that Truth.

Yes, I said if. I did dare to strike the keys on my keyboard to type out "if we accept that Truth." I say this because of the many references in Scripture that say that Christ's Gift of Salvation is offered to all Mankind that some will reject. The Holy Spirit is Jesus giving Light to Every Man. John 1:9 is very clear. If this isn't apparent to you, read it for yourself.

That was the true Light which gives light to every man coming into the world.

Yes, Christ's Gift is offered to every man. You really can't get much clearer than this, but many are those who would add to the Truth, and therefore twist the Word of God. I will not get into this here, however. I wish to write about the Holy Spirit and I shall.

John 1:9 makes it very clear that every Man will have have access to the Holy Spirit. Those who have Him have Witness of Christ. Through Christ, Man can come to the Father and thereby receive Salvation. Isn't it amazing how Scripture can give light to Scripture? I tell you, this is what is meant by Christ when He said the Spirit is the Spirit of Truth! I would say to all who read this to always seek out the Truth, for it is written, "ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened (Matthew 7:7-8)."

Paul tells us in 1 Thessalonians 5:19-22:

19 Do not quench the Spirit. 20 Do not despise prophecies. 21 Test all things; hold fast what is good. 22 Abstain from every form of evil.

That is to say, if the Holy Spirit leads you, follow. What He tells you, do. Do not despise the Truth given to you, for the Holy Spirit is the Spirit of Truth. Question everything so that you might find what is right and good. Do what is good. Do not do what is evil. We know this to be true from the Scripture. Listen to the Spirit, always and forever. The Unifier will not lead you astray. No Man should say, "God is tempting me," for God does not tempt (James 1:13). I say this to be an assurance to everyone who rightly discerns the Truth and follows after God. As the Holy Spirit is also God, what is True of the Father is True of the Spirit.

I hope this post has been of some help to someone. As I said, to do a truly in-dept study of the Holy Spirit would require a whole book on the subject. What I have proved here is more of an overview of the Subject. I focused on the Witness of the Holy Spirit because it seemed best. It is by the Witness of Christ that we might be saved.

New Dog, Same New Tricks, Or Something Like That

What a Glorious God I serve! It amazes me how spending time with my Father can be so fulfilling! I love to Serve a Lord who can take anything and make it for good. Can I get an Amen?

The other night I went for a run after Bible Study. It went on this run because I could feel the Lord telling me I needed to talk with Him and we needed to have a few things said. I am so glad I went on that run. I geared up for the run and set out with my iPod playing. I was wondering on something that came up in Bible Study.

Signs. I don't get those. God, in His will, doesn't give me signs about what He's said He'll do for me. I get plenty of them after He has done something, but not before. Now, God is not bound at all to give us signs of anything. He does not have to give you a sign that such-and-such is the person you're going to marry. He does not have to gives signs to tell you that you are to do this or that.

Now, don't get me wrong. I have gotten signs of God's will for my life before. Like what I going to school for, God gave me many signs that I should be a teacher, I just ignored them for a while.

It was beautiful though. God and me had a great conversation about that I don't need signs for things. Isn't it wonderful how we're all different? Some of us need signs all the time, yet some of us need them once in a great while. It's so awesome that we serve a God that knows us better than we know ourselves.

Also, God has shown me how much I have in writing. I love to write and some claim I have talent in that (Novel anyone?). Furthermore, it is in my writing that I best express myself. I have loved writing since I learned to do it at school. God has really given me a passion to write and apparently some talent in that. I love it so much.

The run was simply beautiful. Words fail to describe my spiritual high that night. I remember listening to Disciple at one point. Their song "Dive" is on my running tracks. The chorus is based off Isaiah 40:31.

But those who wait on the LORD
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.

I was reminded of this Scripture. I quoted it slightly out of order during my run, but I knew what was being said. The chorus is " I'll run and not grow weak/Walk and will not faint/Climb the highest mountain to dive off/And I'll fly high on broken wings." It is a powerful song. It really gets me pumped every time.

My run was so recharging. I was tired after I finished, but I was so happy. I ran like I haven't in some time and It was great. It was funny how Satan tried the next day to put me in a foul mood. He tried to fight me with my contacts, with my sleep, even my plans for the evening. Yet he failed about I know something he keeps forgetting. The Lord is my strength and my refuge.

I Can See Clearly Now the Blur is Gone

This morning I woke up with The most Painful Migraine I have had in some time. It seriously felt like I had a drill going through my skull while my head was on fire! Plus, I could barely see out of my right eye. I was in so much pain, I decided that I just really didn't feel like braving my way to General Psychology and listening to Dr. Kemp drone on about things I already know and his experiences in graduate school. (Seriously, when am I ever going to use someone else's graduate stories in real life?) Well, I woke up an hour later, in even worse pain than I was in when I originally woke up. While I could see clearly, my stomach now felt like some big body-builder was punching me repeatedly in the stomach. Plus, light hurt my eyes so much! (Trust me, photo-sensitivity, sensitivity to light, is a painful, painful thing.)

I was glad at the time I was experiencing mild to no audio-sensitivity (sound = pain). I was equally glad that my next class was Experiencing Music, which is in a dimly lit room. Well, I was glad, all the way up until I tried actually walking to class. That's when the dizziness set in. Walking to class while the whole world spun around me. It wasn't fun. I felt even more like I wanted to throw up. Any way, I'm sitting in class, feeling like death, when my photo-sensitivity decides I need to be hurt by sound now, right as we start listening to Operas! I mean, opera hurts enough on its own, but when you add audio-sensitivity into the mix, that's an all new kind of pain.

After class, I drag myself back to my dorm room. I know that it is lunch time, but the apple I grabbed on my way to Experiencing Music had been unappealing and tasted terrible. I had no appetite, but I knew I had to eat something. So, I walk into the cafeteria, looking at all the food there. I really don't like the food there, but I have a meal plan that lets me eat there unlimited every time it's open, so I almost always eat there. Nothing sounded or looked good to me. Nothing was appealing. Normally I can find something or throw a quick dish together using odds and ends from the food available there. Yet I couldn't today. After a lot of self-motivating, I finally forced myself to choke down some spaghetti with some tomato sauce.

Then, I head off to Modern American Literature to take my test. With a migraine. A test I have not studied for, with my head feeling like it was splitting in two, despite taking some Excedrin for the pain. Fortunately for me, I knew most of the test and could easily pick out 8 of 12 items to identify (which was the idea of the test) with only one author forgotten. Not too bad if I say so myself.

This is where my day starts to get better. I get a call from Wal-Mart letting me know my new glasses are in, and it was only Wednesday that I had my eye exam. I picked up my glasses and got my trial pair of contacts in (it took me and hour and a half to get them in both eyes, one out and back in again, but it was worth it!). My migraine had subsided or been dulled enough that I had an appetite again, so a ate a healthy (in portion) dinner. Then, lo and behold, I'm practicing on my guitar and I finally was able to play three chords in succession without any pauses! (Lily, I'm still not 100% sure in what book I read Jasmine Lily, but I like my guitar's name!) I was so excited, especially since I had once played two chords in succession and could never do it again. Well, I kept at it, and have now played four chords in succession! I think I finally got past the little stump in my practicing. Soon, I will hopefully be able to play the song I am learning!

It's funny how our days are. We have bad days, yet we still have an Awesome God who can give us little bits of joy, even when we're having bad days. Today, I enjoyed four hours of sight without the aid of glasses, tomorrow will find me able to use my trial contacts for a full six hours. Tonight, I had some pancakes at an event we had in my building and was able to play some ping-pong, at which I am happy to say I am slowly improving. Our God is an Awesome God and I am glad to serve Him, even on migraine days.

"Well, You Don't Have to Be Sarcastic About It."

Everyone who knows me knows I'm sarcastic. That's what you get when you deal with me. Yet, I'm not trying to to be mean with it. I can come across as mean, but most people realize that it just how I am. I am sarcastic. However, it's been worse lately, and I'm not sure why.

I suppose I'm sarcastic for any number of reasons. I come from a sarcastic family. I am somewhat cynical. I have a level of intelligence. A lot of my friends are sarcastic. It's just how it is. I try not to be mean, and I do what I can to discern when not to be sarcastic. However, despite all this, my sarcasm has gotten worse lately.

My comment and replies are constantly sarcastic anymore. I find myself saying things that simply don't need to be said that way. Is it the stress of looking for a job? I hope not. I've been under a lot more stress than my current condition and my sarcasm has been in check. Is it some change in my life? Well, I'd understand if my life wasn't at it's normal state of confusion. Am I afraid of something? I've racked my brain and I can't think of one thing that's scaring me enough to make me react in fear. I've been casting my doubts on the Lord and His has answered my prayers, as He always does. That's when I touch on something. Have I drifted from my Father?

I'm stubborn with a capital S-T-U-B-B-O-R-N. I wouldn't take too much offensive to being called "bull-headed." I am stubborn and I know it. The Lord uses that stubbornness and breaks it down all the same. What I mean is, He takes my stubborn self and makes me diligent, which is the positive side of stubborn. Then He takes my unwillingness to do some things and my standing on the wrong things and breaks it all down. I become more diligent than stubborn, but I'm still very stubborn.

I wonder if that stubbornness is rearing it's ugly head again. Am I refusing to do something and I'm reacting with sarcasm? Or is there some secret fear that I'm too stubborn to admit? It's not hidden from the Lord, but my own stubborn stupidity (for that's what stubbornness usually is) won't let me give it up. The old, dead flesh is still clinging on to the Renewed Soul. This fights weapon, sarcasm. However, it might just be I'm overly sarcastic and I'm just too cynical and I need to get that in check. Only time with the Lord will tell.

Electing Election (Salvation)

I've spent a long time thinking about this post. I've invested a lot of prayer into it, and study. It has been a debate that I have not been the first to weigh in on, nor do I believe I'll be the last. The debate is if we choose to accept Christ's Salvation, or if some of us are Saved while others don't even get the chance. The Calvinistic view is that some of us are "Elected," or chosen, to be Saved while the rest of us are damned to Eternal Death. I was in a debate with a TULIP Calvinist for a good couple of months last year and it was hard to talk with him. I found myself praying and crying for him. I read and studied and listened, and yet I couldn't understand how he could possibly believe what he did about Salvation. I am no nearer that conclusion now than I was then. However, I feel it best to have out what I have found in Scripture and say my piece. I don't want to weigh in with this particular Calvinist again. Not because I feel that I'm better than him in any way, but I feel it is not my place. However, I am not one to let things build up to the breaking point, so I will post my thoughts and be done with it.

The belief that we are Elected into Salvation is a very strange belief. To me, it ignores many parts of Scripture, both from the New and Old Testaments. However, because I have to go into what the words used are, and there are those who would say, "Don't argue about the meaning of words." I have yet to find that in the Bible. It may be there, it may not be. Regardless, I am not here to argue the meanings, but understand the meanings. To this point, I would like to point out that we are called by Jesus to "be wise as serpents and harmless as doves" (Matthew 10:16). Now, what does that mean to be "wise as serpents." Well, in all my years of church and the Bible, there is only one serpent that had any character at all. I am of course talking about the Serpent in the Garden of Eden. His knowledge of the words of the Lord was so great that he was able to twist them to his own meaning, to his own gain. Now, I am not saying we should twist what words mean, but rather that we should know our words so well that we could twist them, that is have the ability to do it. (I hope no one who reads this feels justified twisting the meaning of words, but rather understands that one should have an intimate knowledge of the words.) That being said, I will continue.

The first part of Scripture I would like to look into is John 3:16-17, "16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. 17 For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved." Now, the word "world" is what I would like to look at in this part of Scripture. Jesus was speaking in Greek at this time and Greek is a language that has multiple words for the same thing. However, these words don't mean the exact same thing. "World" has four separate meanings for the four separate words. However, the use of world here is always kosmos, which means the world in the complete and total since. I will remind the reader that this was Christ speaking about Himself and His Purpose in the world. To say that He only meant those who are "Elected" ignores Christ's words. It also claims that our Lord and Savior has a limited world view, and though He ate with sinners, He somehow could not see them. I assure you, this is not true, for He came so they might be saved.

Might be saved is the key in that passage. That shows us something. It shows us that there are those who won't be saved. However, some might say that it means that we are chosen to be saved while others are not. I ask you, were in that passage does Jesus say that? Not by any means is that what is being said here. If we look on:

18 He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. 19 And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. 20 For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed. 21 But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God."

The Lord does not say at any point in this speech that we are "elected" into our Salvation. It says that those who don't come to the Lord don't come because of their wickedness and those who do come are watched over by the Lord. I do not see the Lord saying that some can be saved while others cannot.

Well, some may say, but Jesus said no one comes to the Father except through Him (John 14:6). I say to them that the life that Jesus offers is the light for men that shines through the darkness (John 1:4-5). However, because I do not wish for someone to claim I'm misquoting the Bible, here is John 1:4-5: 4 In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. 5 And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.

These are not the only passages that deal with this subject. The Bible has a lot more to say. For instance, some argue that man excepting Christ's free gift of Salvation is someone outside the scope of man. They say the men who do not know Christ cannot accept Christ. I would point them to the Old Testament where Moses proved a very different point.

Allow me to set the stage for you. The peoples of Israel and Moses have been traveling in the desert for some time now. They are weary and hungry. Now, to the verses, Numbers 21:4-9.

4 Then they journeyed from Mount Hor by the Way of the Red Sea, to go around the land of Edom; and the soul of the people became very discouraged on the way. 5 And the people spoke against God and against Moses: "Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? For there is no food and no water, and our soul loathes this worthless bread." 6 So the Lord sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and many of the people of Israel died. 7 Therefore the people came to Moses, and said, "We have sinned, for we have spoken against the Lord and against you; pray to the Lord that He take away the serpents from us." So Moses prayed for the people. 8 Then the Lord said to Moses, "Make a fiery serpent, and set it on a pole; and it shall be that everyone who is bitten, when he looks at it, shall live." 9 So Moses made a bronze serpent, and put it on a pole; and so it was, if a serpent had bitten anyone, when he looked at the bronze serpent, he lived.

What we see here is an act of faith by the people. It was not the whole of Israel, but those who looked at the bronze serpent. Was it the serpent that saved them? No, for it was a bronze figure on a pole. Was it Moses that saved them? No, Moses did simply what he was asked to do by both the people and the Lord. It was the Lord that saved them. However, it's not just that He saved them, but how they were saved. They were saved by believing in the Lord and that He would save them if they looked upon the serpent. They were saved by grace, through faith, just as Jesus saves us now.

I wish this was enough to make my point, but it is not. By stepping into the Old Testament, I have entered the Old Testament Law and must look into it to complete what it is I must say. Now, it should be common knowledge for Christians that Jews are the Lord's Chosen People. If you are a believer and did not know this, allow to give you this piece of knowledge: Israel is God's Chosen Nation, and the Jews are God's Chosen People. The verses that deal with that are part of a different point and won't be dealt with here.

I will, however, deal with the Law's provision for non-Jewish believers. This is during the time before Christ, so Christ had not yet died on the cross and had yet to Rise again on the third day. Yet, the Lord was still the Lord. However, the Law given to the Jews did account for non-Jewish peoples keeping the Law of Moses. They are were the strangers that dwell among the the Israelites. I would ask you, how is it, if God has a chosen people, which one could base the "Elect" on, why would strangers be included? Simple, non-Jews could live under the Law just like Jews could. How could they do this? They are not God's chosen people, yet they are summiting themselves to God's will? Well, the Election-toting Calvinist has an "answer" to that as well, that they were led by the Holy Spirit to follow the Lord.

Well, I would like to quote the best possible source to answer this one, Jesus Himself.

9 "So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. 11 If a son asks for bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish? 12 Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? 13 If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!"

What is Jesus saying here? Ask and maybe you'll receive? Seek and maybe you'll find? No, the Lord was not saying that at all! I will not argue with a Calvinist that we need the Holy Spirit, the Helper that Christ sent to us (John 14:26). But it is clearly two things. One, anyone can receive the Holy Spirit. God Created man, to claim that some of us cannot be saved or will not be saved is to claim that some of us are not part of God's creation, which is not possible. Therefore, we are all whom Christ meant when He spoke of God's children, especially mentioning that we are evil. That's a key to show us He meant all of us. Two, before Christ, the only mention of the Holy Spirit was the prophets. The prophets did not say that people can only follow the Lord whom He chooses to follow Him, not one. Nor did they say the Holy Spirit picks and chooses whom may receive Salvation. Jesus didn't say that either. Not one place will you find Jesus telling anyone that they might not receive the Holy Spirit. Instead, you find Him saying that we have to ask Him for it!

I would like to further point out that the Lord calls us to repent. The word "repent," in the three different forms it is used, appears 80 times throughout the Bible's 66 books. The meanings used for them are to be sorry, to think differently or reconsider, and to care afterwards or regret. The first two definitions are the most common, the first being the New Testament usage, the usage Jesus would have used. To be sorry, to repent, the New Testament calls us to this some 41 times in the 27 books that comprise it. I ask you, if only some of us can repent, why would we all be called to repent? It's simple, because we all can repent. All of us can be forgiven.

Now, I must address this last part, or what I have said will be moot in point. Seeing as man is a slave to sin and can only be freed by Christ, some Calvinists have come to the conclusion that by accepting Christ, man somehow does a "good work." Well, the Lord says our good works are like unto filthy rags (Isaiah 64:6). However, I have yet to find a passage that says man cannot repent, especially when the Holy Spirit is available to all who ask. It is flawed logic to think that repenting is a "good work." If we look at John again, the first several verses I provided state that man will not come into the light "lest his deeds should be exposed." Allow me to help with understanding this. So far, I have been using the New King James Version of the Bible, but I would like to switch to the New International Version for just a bit so that we can better see what John 3:20 is saying.

20 Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed.

I do this because the New King James is slightly difficult to understand. We see that fear is the underlying factor of why men to no come into the light. However, Jesus did not stop there. The very next verse begins with, "But he who does the truth..." There's a very dangerous word, "but." That means there is a counterpoint, there is something that is different here. Somewhere, somehow, man can come into the truth. There is no evidence that we are Elected into Salvation, but we see much more that suggests we can be saved, no matter who we are.

Now, I might be asked, then what is asking for forgiveness? Is that not a good deed? Let me ask you something, is murder a sin? Yes it is. What is Salvation? Death of the old self and rebirth in the Spirit. You see, we don't ask the Lord to save us to do something good, we do it because we realize, "Hey, I'm a sinful creature and without Christ, I'm going to Eternal Death, I don't want that." Yet, the side effect of asking for forgiveness and truly asking for it is Being Born Again, casting off the old, sinful nature, and becoming a new being that's molded into God's Holy Will, none of these things we can do, only the Lord can. So, my answer is, how is it a good work to do nothing? How is it a good work to repent? How is it a good work to kill off the old self? God does the work, sets us on our feet for the first time, and you call that a good work? I call that the Lord's Good Workmanship. I could not accept Salvation if the Lord hadn't sent Jesus to die on the Cross, defeat death by rising on the third day, sent the Holy Spirit, created me, and then made it possible for me to hear of His Salvation. Work indeed.

Talent for the Talentless

This Sunday I was faced with myself yet again. I had one of those moments where I had to hold onto my Father's Hand and just cry. I felt so broken and so worn down, so useless. It was something so pointless and stupid, but it had such deep meaning that I see now I needed to go through another moment of feeling faint.

The Lord has placed some talented people in my life. My friends have many talents that I find impressive and I love how they use them. One of my friends has been blessed with a wonderful talent for singing and guitar playing. When she's not doubting herself, she plays some of most beautiful music. I also have a friend you has a talent for just being there for you when you need him. It's like he always knows when it's time "to go for a walk." I think some of our greatest bonding times have been on walks. I have so many more examples, yet that is not the point of this post. I felt as if I had none. No talents to my name. I felt like I was worthless and had no value to anyone or anything. My friends noticed I was visibly upset and asked what was wrong. I couldn't tell them and have it out in front of everyone. No, it was my shame. This was all before the sermon started in church. It was a good sermon on the Marriage Covenant, yet it was not the message the Lord had for me that day. (The following is an approximation of the conversation my soul had with the Lord.)

"Why have you made me this way?" I asked desperately as the sermon began.
"In what way is that?" I felt the Lord reply.
"So talentless, so useless..." was all I could say.
"But you write so beautifully, and your passion for teaching is great. Have I not given you these things and more?"
That took me aback for a bit. "Yes..." I replied reluctantly.
"Then how can you say I have made you talentless?" asked the Lord.
"I...I can't do anything for You though," I said, almost hurt.
"My son, why do you say that? You can teach for me, learn for me, talk for me, walk, love, write, play, pray, and so much more. Have I not blessed you with the ability to bring cheer to those without it? Have I not given you comedy? Selflessness? Honesty? Was it not I who gave everything you have?"
"Lord, it is as you say. But what can I really do for You? Am I to write? To teach? Talk? What is my ministry? What are my talents?" I asked, wondering if I was wrong for this.
"My child," came the Lord's reply, "you know more than you want to admit. What are you doing?"
I wasn't sure what this meant at first, then I realized, "Lord, I'm going to teach, dance, sing, love, cry, just overall live, and that's what I'm learning to do now."
"Now go to the Alter," was the Lord's response.
"But, what if they don't have an alter call? What then?" I asked, stupidly.
"Not that alter. My Alter."

Some people may read this and say, "Shame on you, you should have been paying attention to the pastor!" My response to those of you who say that, "Shame on you for valuing the words of a man, though they be from the Lord, over the Words of the Lord Himself." I'd trade a thousand days in a Bible believing church for one day to listen just to the Lord's very Voice. As such, I also heard the message, but it's one I well know. I have studied marriage very closely in the Biblical context, and I know a lot of what it says. Do I know it all? I doubt it, but the Lord had something for me that day and I'm glad for it.

I do not write this to condemn anyone or any church. If you go to church and don't have a "Soul to Spirit" conversation; that's fine. If you have one of these every day; good for you. If it's once and a while; that's how it is. I write this as encouragement. The Lord answers prayers and He cares about where you're at. He wants you to get from where you're at to where He wants you to be. I'd much rather be there than here, and I hope you do too.

Running Like The Devil's Chasing Me

I'm often reminded of how complex the human mind can be. There are times that we can't understand what's bothering us. That is to say, we know some thing's on our mind, but it's buried so deep, we can't figure out what it is. Sometimes, however, it's so deep that we're not even aware that it's an issue until it surfaces somehow.

I do some of my best thinking when I run. I remember when it became too hectic for me to handle at home, which it would from time to time, I would go for a walk. My walks would later become jogs. The jogs in turn became runs. Sometimes I left to clear my head and think over what was happening. Other times I would leave to calm down. I found running became the best method for this. Not only did it calm me down faster, but it helped me to think faster because of the increased use of my brain due to the running. I found myself ready to return to situation and try and solve it as best I could. Because of this, running became my escape in many ways. I could simply disappear from somewhere and reappear with a more calm, clear mind. Also, it allowed me to just get away from people, for there are times that I simply want my space. There were even times that I couldn't just simply leave and go run, so I would wait until late at night, when everyone else was asleep, and run. Sometimes, I ran just to feel free.

It was because of my running that I realized something, I'm still mad at my dad. When my family first abandoned me, I had a favorite song. "Which to Bury, Us or the Hatchet" by Relient K. I listened to it as thought about what had happened. I didn't and still don't hate my dad, but I was mad at him for so long, I couldn't stand the thought of him at times. Imagine how much more painful it was to find I was like him! It was like venom in my mouth, and I was angry with myself! I spent so much time trying to reinvent myself. I changed my looks, how I walked, how I talked, everything. Yet, somehow, I was still my father's son. I could never escape that, no matter how much I wanted to.

Then, suddenly, I found myself freed of this. So what if I am my father son? I am also my Heavenly Father's son. I only have to do what I am called to do and I will become who I will be. That's not so bad, is it? So what if my father was used to be part of the mold that is me? I will be made a new man as Scripture says, so I need not worry.

Yet, then I went for a run. I had my iPod playing my running tracks mix just as I have many times before, when it came on. The song. If you never heard it, the chorus is a little something like, "No I don't hate, don't wanna fight you, know I'll always love you but right now I just don't like you, 'cause you took this too far." That's went I realized, I was still mad at my dad. However, I was able to run it out for now. That's such a great feeling, running your problems down so you can deal with them.

Sweet Sarah, Rest and Be Still

Sarah, Sweet Sarah
Why the tears on your face?
Sarah, Sweet Sarah
For what do you mourn?

Is it because Daddy gone
Or Momma's teary face?
Is for your broken home
Or for all the human race?
Is for the mothers
Or the children in their arms?
Is for the failure
Or all that's gone wrong?

Sarah, Sweet Sarah
Why the tears on your face?
Sarah, Sweet Sarah
For what do you mourn?

(I'm not really sure why I wrote this, who this is to, or anything. I just felt it on my heart and wrote it. I have been coming back to it for a while now and nothing is coming to me on how to finish it. I feel it should be published however.)